How Long is a Piece of String?

...How long can I really be single?

So yes, it does bother me a lot actually that I am single. No matter how good I think I am at being single, it still sucks. Not in a self loathing ‘why is my life so bad’ kind of way, but just in the way that yes, it is crap.

Don’t get me wrong I do try; we all do. We buy new clothes, have nice hair and smile a lot and make good with what we have got, but apparently it is just not enough!

Enough with the self help books ‘he’s just not that into you’, ‘it’s just a date’ and ‘how to be single’. Enough is enough. No amount of informed reading will prepare you for the real word of single life. No amount of good advice given out by friends – and sometimes even strangers – will help.

You are single. Clearly it’s not your fault (all the books say so) and so therefore you spend yet another weekend in the supermarket shopping for one. Frozen dinners for one. Single slice of cheesecake for one. Life for one.

‘No that’s not another diet I am starting, that’s just how much food one person needs to eat.’

Its like the obesity epidemic brought on the idea of sharing the packet of tim tams with more than just yourself, but what about the rest of us loners out there? Fun to share plastered all across the packets in front of smiling families on picnics is just bullshit. Who has picnics these days anyways?

‘Hi my name is Michelle and I am single.’ You can just hear the words ringing out now at the singles anonymous meeting.

‘I have now been single now…oh lets see…my entire life?’

Sympathetic sighs fill the room from those who know the feeling. That feeling that no one else understands unless they too are in the middle of a drought; waiting for the rain that will never come.

I don’t hate couples, they just piss me off. Why sit there and rub it in? I’m not bitter at all. Just seriously pissed at the over share. I don’t sit there and complain to you how bitter and lonely I am, so why should I care that you like kissing the same person every five minutes for the rest of your life?

I don’t care either that this is an age old gripe amongst all single women around the world. Highlighted as a ‘serious issue’ by all who are single until a week later when they meet the person of their dreams and live happily ever after. Bullshit. Total and utter crap.

There is only so much sympathetic set-ups and Christmases alone before you seriously consider ending it all. I don't want to jump off a bridge and die; that's a tad extreme. I just don't want to be single!

Where are the movies about not finding the one true love? The movies where the one you love is in love with another? The movies where you really do end up old and alone surround by cats?

So what happens to the rest of us? The ones who never find ‘The One’?

And what happens to me? Because I hate cats!

One Fine Day.

When the sun is shining, everything in the world looks a whole lot better. The endless deadlines and piles of work seem to just disappear on a good fine day. Maybe it's just something about the way it warms your skin and soul from the inside out that makes it just so darn good.

Don't you just wish sometimes you could bottle all the good moments in life so on the days when the sun doesn't shine, you can be reminded that there is always going to be a better day tomorrow.

Selfish of me I know, but when the sun comes out, it's going to be a good day. It motivates and inspires me like nothing else. Am always happier on a sunny day because I know there are so many others around me who will be happy too.

It's like that song. Everyone has one. That one song, that one movie, that one person that just makes everything OK.

My favourite time of the year is when you can spend hours outside well after the sun has gone down without getting cold. Just before this time of the year rolls around the days leading up to it are truly beautiful too. Cloudless blue sky with just a little nip in the air, but as long as there is a couch inside with the sun on it I am there.

The weather has such a profound impact on me that I wouldn't mind packing it all in to spend the rest of my life chasing the ultimate dream of the endless summer. Maybe next time the sun comes out I'll pack my bags and follow it across the horizon as it waits to rise in another day.

I Have a Dream...

'If you can dream it, you can do it...' - Walt Disney.

Dreams are an interesting thing. When I say dreams, I don't just mean the ones you wake up from wondering what the hell happened, but the ones we all have. Consciously.

Secretly I am convinced everyone wishes they could fly. That's a dream of mine. I wish I could fly through the sky, not to be able to get anywhere quicker, but to be able to experience everything from a different point of view.

Imagine being able to soar across the tops of mountains and rivers, seeing all of nature's wonder at it's best with no limits or boundaries.

I read somewhere once that dreams are for those who are too scared to live in reality. That's the biggest load. If we didn't dream we would never get anywhere. But how do we dream without jumping off a cliff without a parachute?

It's all finding that fine line in between fact and fiction, reality and dreams. It's about writing your own story, whether you want it to be fact or fiction and playing the role you write for yourself good enough to win an Oscar.

Human Beans

Doesn't matter what you are going to fail at, but if your going to fail, group failure is the best way to do it. Not only is it convenient that you can all sit round and talk about how you are going to fail, but it just feels good to know that there are other people out there failing just as bad as you.

The only thing that feels better than all sitting around talking about how you are going to fail, but when you realise that you aren't going to fail quite as bad as the person sitting next to you.

It's horrible, but it's what makes us human. All those nasty little emotions that get in the way of every day living. Love. Hate. Greed. As horrible as it is, it's what distinguishes us from robots.

So the next time someone attempts to call you insane for being jealous that they stole your crush, or psycho because you kicked them out without their clothes, remember that you have the right to be crazy in love. Because you are human.

You Ain't Got Nothing Kid.

Right now, my life seriously needs some perspective. I have food to eat and a roof over my head and I think I have problems.

Problems are what starving children dying from malnutrition and hunger in third world countries have. Problems are what people have who experience violence and war, and as a result go through suffering and pain.

Honestly, I really have nothing to complain about. There is no one forcing me to do something I don't want to be doing. Essentially I am free.

I just have to stop sometimes and remind myself that it is not always about me, there is a bigger world out there than the one am currently living in.

Procrastin-ate ME

The key to procrastination is to make it seem like you are doing something that is far more important instead of what you are actually suppose to be doing so that in the end, it still feels like you have done something.

1. Write a list
2. Make tea
3. Do the most urgent job on the list last
4. Get a blog
5. Check Facebook
6. Get myspace
7. Check e-mail
8. Add more things to list
9. Make more tea
10. Eat something
11. Read paper
12. Check mail
13. Pair socks
14. Nap
15. Walk cat
16. Hand write letter to Grandmother
17. More tea
18. Shuffle papers
19. Turn computer back on
20. Get stuff done

This is by far the best...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4P785j15Tzk

Whats in a Blog?

Whats in a blog? Is it the same as asking whats in a name? Either way, I have no answer.

Starting this blog is an experiment, an experiment that I am sure many before me have tried. Already I have so many questions that need to be answered and no one out there to answer them for me. Choosing the colour scheme for the page was hard enough; a sign that I know it will be an interesting journey (struggle).

The blog I have decided, is no different to the pink diary kept under the bed as a teenager, minus the tears and teenage angst that filled pages and pages of the book. However, unlike the teenage diary I will try my hardest to find interesting and exciting things to fill these pages, no longer having the teenage angst excuse to use as a topic.

So apart from wondering what to write, its all very exciting. Exciting enough to make me join the blogging revolution, and wonder in anticipation about what to write next.